Covid rules are a joke
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- Last Updated: Sunday, 21 February 2021 15:48
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THIS IS HILARIOUS
A MUST READ
We all need a laugh in these times
Covid 19 is a Virus that is Educated, very Smart and Clever Virus.
Based on Government announcements, we know that :
It won't infect people at a wedding, unless there's more than 50 people. And it also won't infect anyone at a funeral, as long as there's not more than 20 people. So not only can the virus count, it can also differentiate between a wedding and a funeral.
This Virus owns a watch and can tell time. It does spread in public places and restaurants, but only after 9 pm and not before. So, it's safe to be out before 9 pm and not after 9 pm
.
It also only infects if you're in a group of more than 4, but not at weddings or funerals where it's 50 and 20 people, obviously.
Masks do work, that's why people will be fined for not wearing them, but not in pubs and restaurants, because as already discovered, the virus doesn't infect in pub or restaurants until after 9 pm.
You can also safely remove your mask at a crowded eating place beause the Virus is polite and won't attack when you are eating.
But don't remove your mask before food is served, as the Virus will attack if it sees you without mask and not eating.
Cinemas, gyms, etc are also immune from the virus coz the virus can't afford cinema tickets or gym memberships.
The Virus also sticks to specific postcodes and barricades, this is why some areas have stricter rules than others. And once you cross the border, the Virus will not follow you.
The Virus attacks those who do not queue up for public transportation, so you see everyone practices social distancing and queue.
But once inside the buses and commuter trains, then you are fine to be crowded because the Virus won't attack as it hates travelling in crowded public vehicles.
But once you get off the crowded public vehicles, then you are not safe again in private vehicles and cannot travel in the same car because the Virus doesn't like those who are not from the same address travelling together in private cars.
Oh, and political gatherings are perfectly fine in large groups regardless of any rules. That's because the Ministers set the rules, and the Virus obeys the rules.
It's OK not to quarantine if the Minister says so and the Virus will look for other victims. It will not touch govt. employees or govt. pass holders.
Prisoners are fine to be crowded and since they are in prison, the Virus doesn't like criminals, so social distancing is not important for them.
The Virus is very merciful because it doesn't attack beggers and homeless people living on street and footpaths as it knows they cannot afford tests and hospitalisation.
The Virus will not touch you for fifteen days if you have done a PCR test and proven negative.
The Virus takes a vacation from waving at people during Festivals and returns to start a second wave.
